WHO AM I? PERHAPS THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION WE WILL EVER SEEK TO ANSWER!
As human beings we choose so many ‘personas’ in our lives. We cannot avoid doing so as they are aspects of our personalities and evolve alongside how we each uniquely experience LIFE. Personas are simply the ways WE want the world to see us in a particular situation … we can all be good actors .. and adopt very convincing characters. Versions of I AM ….
Capable. efficient. caring, adventurous, safe, quiet, thoughtful, playful, intelligent, independent, in control, or it can mean roles we take on like mother, father, daughter, teacher, doctor, carer. As we grow older we can switch from one persona to the other depending on what’s needed at the time.
That makes us adaptable BUT it often covers up who we REALLY are.
A child needs to be nurtured and loved. It will do its absolute best to achieve that. Behaviours we learned then which bring us those warm and fuzzy feelings provide us with strategies we use all our lives. If we are not nurtured and loved, a child is thrown into some very primitive survival behaviours which again colour their lives, often literally.
If we have siblings we have to adjust to family dynamics and maybe rivalry. The who am I question becomes more an more important yet more and more difficult to answer. It’s I AM ME .. but who is ME?? And then we go to school! It becomes all about fitting in.
And teenagers? A different breed
A bunch of teenagers with hormones coursing through their bloodstream, developmental physical and mental changes altering ever aspect of their playing field. Changing peer relationships and the emergence of sexual feelings. How can they feel anything other that confused. Their constant dilemma seems to be one of “I don’t know who I am!” and no wonder!
And Adulthood .. surely we know now? Jobs, independence, money, friends, families, kids, So OK! The hormones have settled but we then start to bump into a world new world of expectations
Have you ever tried asking yourself in a quiet moment who you are?
Find a mirror and look into it. That may feel really difficult to do but try and stick with this.
Ask your reflection .. your self … WHO AM I?
What ever comes hear it …. allow it …. but don’t speak it .
Let me talk you through this : …. Then try it for yourself .. Don’t force and answer .. just let it come .. ALLOW IT .. DO NOT REJECT IT ..
- BEGIN with a PAUSE
- PAUSE AND BREATHE, SLOWLY AND DEEPLY
- PLACE YOUR HAND ON YOUR HEART
- AS YOURSELF THE QUESTION “WHO AM I..?”
ASK yourself this over and over … just allow whatever comes.
If you find yourself saying ‘This is NOT what I want to hear!” It may well be a voice coming from a part of you that’s always judging you. It feels as if this part is almost sat on your shoulder. Strangely, earlier in our lives, this part was there to help us , to protect us, to advise us. But as we grow up it becomes full of its own self importance and gets out of control …..
Where it once guided us it now criticises all we do. .. It can feel very hurtful. It doesn’t mean to be. Just allow it. You can try the saying the following:
- TELL IT YOU HEAR IT AND THAT’S OK. BUT IF IT CARRIES ON, DON’T PUT UP WITH IT.
- TELL IT YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH THIS IS NOT WHO YOU ARE.
This might feel a bit odd. But we can have a beautiful relationship with our self! But like any relationship it needs to be begun gently, then nurtured. Try it .. and I would love to hear what happens!